Beyond “Dualities” in Poetry by Jason Phoebe Rusch

“Dualities,” the debut poetry collection by Jason Phoebe Rusch (Short Flight/Long Drive Books, 2018),  is a coming of age story told in mostly first person. The collection of poetry glimpses into someone’s life, one narrative at a time. Rusch captivates readers with vivid words describing times, places and feelings.

In “What Do You Love About Haiti?” readers get to know a little more about Rusch. He travels, including time in Haiti during an earthquake. The powerful images here suggest he witnessed the aftermath of the 7.0 magnitude earthquake in 2010, as Rusch states:

I’d never seen a dead body
before the earthquake. The earth
that day felt like something moving
underneath, in pursuit…
After the earthquake, I became accustomed
to the smell of death, no longer noticed it
clinging to my clothes, my skin. It became
the norm that houses should look like dioramas,
rooms exposed: staircases twisted and mangled,
kitchen tables tilting.

These words leave the reader uncomfortable yet compassionate. Indeed, uncomfortable yet compassionate is the theme throughout “Dualities.”

Issues with the narrator’s father are often present across “Dualities.” “Transitive Properties” exposes a father sexualizing his daughter, even when apologizing for sexualizing his daughter. Then in “Daddy Issues,” the narrator points out their own cliche of having an emotionally abusive father—for instance, a father who makes his young daughter grab her belly fat and tells her she was only beautiful when she was two years old—and how it had an effect on the narrator’s choice in significant others or lovers. It is shocking to hear horrific things parents can say to their children, but it isn’t too shocking to know it has a lasting effect on the child, even in adulthood. It is refreshing to see an adult analyze the past to see how they got to the present. This is the very definition of “coming of age.”

“Dualities” will keep you reading and while it may be tempting to live vicariously or play the voyeur by peaking into someone else’s sex life, these poems are more than titillation. Readers experience how these subjects grow from each experience. Rusch’s narrator gives up plenty of juicy, and sometimes painful, sex stories. In pieces like “Men Tell Me I’m Selfish” and “Querying,” a fearless voice discusses things from kissing to oral sex, and also the human growth that comes from sexual experience.

Pop culture injects a sense of fun into this work. “Erotic Jealousy” mentions those magazine or online quizzes we take to find out stuff we just had to know (or didn’t really need to know) about ourselves, and how sometimes those quizzes just don’t get us or give us appropriate answer choices.

“Facebook Knows” talks about what we all talk about. The advertisements we get really delve into our personal lives: what we search, what we talk about, and somehow what we think about.

I am not out, not even to myself, and yet a page for FtMs seeking to build muscle mass appears in my suggestions.

Safe to say, you can expect some entertainment or laughs in this emotional read. Still, growth and duality remain the focus of this collection. The narrator struggles with identity, sexuality and gender. This is a peek inside the dueling mind with dual personalities. On being born female with heterosexuality a foregone societal conclusion, and experience with bisexuality. Readers are made to to wonder masculine gender identity is a good fit. Then, unsure if it even matters. Does it matter?

“Dualities” won’t give us and easy answer but it also won’t disappoint. Read “Dualities” to interrogate what actually matters.

 

Megan Andreuzzi is an animal lover and a traveler from the New Jersey Shore. She earned a degree from Arcadia University in Glenside, Pennsylvania, USA in Liberal Studies with a dual concentration in writing and a minor in theatre.